Differences Between Women and Men
1. Names:
If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.
2. Eating Out:
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50.
None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want the change back.
When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
3. Money:
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.
4. Bathrooms:
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.
5. Arguments:
A woman has the last word in any argument.
7. Future:
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
8. Success:
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
9. Marriage:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change and she does.
10. Dressing Up:
A woman will dress up to go 4 shopping, to water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and read the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
12. Children:
A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
Categories:
Funny_And_Strange
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